2 Months of Contemplation

It´s been just over two months since Katrina and I left Australia. In that short time we´ve experienced and seen some unforgettable sights. It has also been a humbling growing experience in my part.

Facing the fear of the unknown, uncertainty and stressful moments I wouldn´t consider a good thing. But to grow as a person or as a couple I think is a necessity for everybody to go through. You learn a lot more about yourself and life through such moments. Such experiences Katrina and I have both gone through more in these two months then we ever have before. During the past two months we´ve argued, disagreed, been disappointed, and frustrated with each other more than we´ve ever been. In 2.5 years of our relationship rarely did we ever disagree or argue and often we fight with the person we love the most.

Yet, love has held us together and as a couple we´ve grown stronger as we´ve learnt more about each other. Being in uncertain situations the human emotional fuse becomes a lot more shorter, sensitive, and irritable. I love her more because of it.

Learning from these experiences I think it was something that Katrina and I needed to go through to push the boundaries of our relationship as we´ve always been safe. We´ve always been in the white, never in the dark. My Sifu once taught me about balance. To learn about the white you need to venture into the black to learn and grow. To be soft you need to learn what its like to be hard. From that hardness you can become soft as you´ve grown from the hard.

The past few years I´ve really burned myself out mentally and to this moment I´m still overcoming it. Putting so much doubt and pursuit of perfection has drained mentally and the break from the Gold Coast has been really therapeutic on me. I´ve always been the type of person to commit long-term to be the best and what I do. Kung Fu, Tai Chi, Uni, Work, Cultural Activities, I´ve always had my mind set of being remembered and to be able to have people look back and be able to remember me either by name or as a figure effecting them. Doing so I can confidently say that I´ve achieved a lot in the past few years. More than I originally had imagined. But it has also come with a double edged sword burning me out at the same time. Which is why I needed a time to recollect and to reset my goals. Burning myself I´ve lost my passion in some areas and it has grown in others. I´m hoping this year will either reignite a passion or direct me to ´The Pursuit of Happiness´